It is Me again!!

Looks like I have been gone so long that the whole BLOGGER setup has changed!!  Guess that is what you get for being behind like me!!  I am so behind in a lot of things lately.  I think my days have been spent so much differently than they used to be spent!!  I think often at night that I need to blog!!  I can even come up with something to write about and then by morning...well that thought is all gone.

So here I am again trying to get in the habit of blogging!!  I know it is a great habit to be in and I am going to try ONE MORE TIME!!

Time has been flying by here quickly since my dad passed away in May!! I don't know why exactly but it has been just speeding up!! 

FAMILY:

Mother is doing really well.  She is keeping busy by volunteering at the museum where she has been for 20 plus years!!  Boy if only she had been paid!!  But that is not the idea there.  She enjoys her work and it keeps her mind filled with things plus it gives her a goal.  We all need that.

We are fitting again into the Illinois life but still miss Savannah!!  I miss my friends and especially my church.  We are in a good church here but need to get more involved.  I am in BSF again and enjoying it as always.  My health has been pretty good.  Both my brother and I went to have tests to make sure that we do not get what our dad had.  I find out about mine this week.  My brother passed his okay.  We both wanted to be pro-active.

We enjoy our little apartment.  I have learned how to use things that I never knew I would be using.  With no stove it has been fun learning how to cook.  I never liked cooking anyway so here I am learning all over again.  I have learned to use my microwave, George Foreman grill, slow cooker and toaster oven more and more.  I can do it but just never liked it!!

I have been sewing and doing some quilting again.  It has been fun.  Our oldest granddaughter has learned to sew.  It was like she did not have to be taught.  She just sat down and sewed.  She seems to love it.  Nice to know that some others are learning to sew in our family.  Some of these crafts are just going to go away if the younger people do not learn them.  It would be a shame!!  I have always loved doing hand crafts and I hope my granddaughters learn.

Mike is doing great!! He really likes his job.  His selling is just wonderful.  He and another PSE (their title at Lowe's) have been given a mobile office now which includes a laptop, printer and an air card.  He can now go to the customers house with everything thing he needs in order to give them what they are looking for.  Great idea.  He wants to retire but he also knows this is a great benefit for him.  We recently purchased a 2004 Jeep for him to be able to get around in.  It also will flat tow behind our motorhome IF and WHEN we ever get to vacation in it!!  

That seems to be about it.  Nothing exciting I know but just the every day stuff that happen to us.  We are both getting older. Mike just celebrated his 67th birthday!!  Now I am the youngest once again but only by 5 months!!  I always seem to catch up!!

The Middle aged goddess

MY DAD

One week ago today on May 22, 2011, my dad, Dale E. Smith went home to be with his Lord at 11:40 a.m.  We have lost a good and devoted husband, dad, brother and son!!  He is going to be missed by all of us who loved him.

The Friday before Sunday, I had the strangest feeling.  It was like someone was audibly talking to me yet they weren't.  I knew that I had to go to my parent's apartment as soon as I could get there.  I did not want my mother to be alone when Dad did pass away.

I got up on Saturday morning, packed and took off for Tuscola.  When I got there I was really surprised at the way my dad looked.  They had brought in a hospital bed just that week.  He looked at me but am not sure that he knew me.  I talked to him and held his hand.  Mother and I tried to keep the saliva that was forming in his mouth cleaned up.  I guess this is what happens when you cannot swallow or have not had a drink.  He was not eating or drinking by this time.  The saliva that we all have stays clear and thin but when you don't drink something then it becomes a thick white mess. I thought that it looked like white pudding.  Mother worked and worked trying to get it out of his mouth.  Sometimes he would let her help him but most of the time he just swallowed it back. 

He said that he thought he had done his pants.  We checked and found out that we needed something like adult diapers. I ran up to the store and brought some back.  Mother and I had a terrible time just trying to get them under him.  He was a very small man (around 130 lbs.) but very heavy.  WE struggled and struggled.  Finally I called a neighbor to help us lift him up.  We got it under him but could not get the tabs to work.  We ended up using some duct tape!!  It worked!!

We kept watching him.  Family was calling and I told them that they had better come NOW.  Mike, Becky, Julie, Maddie, Emily, Bill all came up Sunday morning.  We had just called the hospice nurse to tell her that we needed her to come.  She came and helped us give him some more moriphine.  We had not given him enough.  She upped it and told us to give more plus she had a medication that helped the saliva thin out!!  As soon as she left our family came.  We all went up to him and told him it was time for him to go now. 

Just a little bit before he passed, he held his right hand up in the air and then dropped it down. We think that he saw someone.  WE were talking and one of the kids said..Look!!  WE all turned around and we saw that Dad was leaving us. Becky had brought her stethoscope.  She ran over to him and listened and could not find a heart beat.  She said he is gone.  Mike said that he looked at the clock to make sure about the time...11:40 AM on the 22nd of May we lost our dad, grandpa, and husband!!  He went to be with God.  We knew that he was finally at rest. He could now walk and not be in any pain!  What a blessing to know that a few years back he had accepted Jesus as his Savior and had been baptized!!  We mourn our loss but we all know that he is in a better place now...

We called hospice and they called everyone that they had to call.  The funeral home came.  Mother and I went back into the bedroom while they took him to the funeral home.  Becky stayed with him while they were in Mother's apartment.  Julie and Bill took the younger granddaughters out just so they would not have to see all of this.  They had just seen their great grandfather pass away!!  It was so good that a large portion of his family were with him at the end.

Monday came and Mother and I had to go to the funeral home and make all of the arrangements.  We tried to pick out what we thought that Dad would like.  Then the next day our family arrived!!  So nice to see them all.  My brother, Ron and his wife and daughter came from Arizona.  Jon and his wife Maria also came.

The funeral was set for Thursday the 26th!! WE woke up to a very rainy and gray day.   Dad really looked good.  Many people came to pay their respects to Mother and our family.  Pastor Mike Rutledge did the service.  We had people tell of the fun times that they had with Dad.  It was a very nice service.  WE had thought we would not get to go to the graveside but it stopped raining just long enough for us to go.

WE had 2 military men there.  They stood at the head and the foot of the casket. After Dad's friend played taps, the soldiers carefully folded our American flag.  The one soldier handed it to the other and he bent down and presented it to Mother.  This whole ceremony was very sad!!  The rain stayed away until we had all filed out and drove back to the Tuscola Museum for our dinner.

The women at the Museum had cooked a very nice meal for everyone that wanted to attend.  Dad and Mother have volunteered there for 25 years.  They all felt like they owed something to my dad.

Now it is over a week since all of this happened.  I am so thankful that Dad had us all there when he passed from this life into a new one.

He was my hero!!  All little girls think that their dads are their heros!!  Mine was in the second world war.  He was wounded and received the purple heart!!  He never talked much about it till the later years of his life.  Mother recorded him speaking and then wrote it all down.  He was in a foxhole the day that he found out that I was born.  He told me that he stood up to tell everyone.  A buddy of his said that he had better get down or he would not see his new baby!!  My dad also named me.  He saw a little girl on a train.  Her name was Sandra Lee.  He wrote to Mother and told her if they had a little girl that he wanted her to be named Sandra Lee.  Mother was going to name me Billie Kay!!  Somewhere I have a woman to thank for my name. 

Taken in Savannah, Ga.



Monday again!!  A start of a new week!!  Our weather here has been just awful so anything new would be good for sure!! 

I am now on a cane...I can say that is better than a walker or a wheel chair.  I have not much enjoyed thse past 2 months but I do know that I have learned some life lessons.  I think that is one of the reasons that things like this happen to us.  I don't believe that God made me fall I do not believe that I just mean that we go through this types of happenings in our lives only to come out on the other side a changed but wiser person. At least that is what I hope I will see.  I already do see some things and I am sure more is going to be coming my way.  Another thing is that we need to be looking for these things.  Looking helps us to see what God wants us to see and remember.  I think sometimes that this is the reason some people cannot see God working!!  Open our eyes that we may see!! 

I am still having a time with living here in Illinois.  I love Illinois after all this is where I was born and lived for years.  Mike and I were talking the other day at lunch and I was reminded what Paul said in the bible. 

Philippians 4:11-13 (King James Version)

¹¹Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever STATE I am, therewith to be content.
¹²I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.
¹³I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

I first learned this verse in the King James Version...It says here in whatsover state I am..to be content.  I told Mike that I was content in the STATE of Georgia..Now I am learning to be content in the STATE of Illinois!!  I know of course this is not what Paul meant EXACTLY!!  But it is what I want to see in these verses for now.  I am trying to be content.  I have not been able to get out much or make any friends and believe me that is the hardest part of moving...Making new friends and getting involved in things that will keep me busy.

Also that verse tells us that I can do all things through Christ because he is strengthening me...Again, we have to learn this lesson.  As I age though I am beginning to understand these principles more and more.  Take one day at a time just like my husband has always told me to do and I will be happy!!  EASY!!

My dad is starting to get worse day by day. He is very weak and cannot stand on his legs anymore.  Mother is trying her best to take care of him.  I think that they will be getting a hospital bed this week from Hospice.  Mike and i went to see them Saturday.  Dad told me right away that he was not worth anything...I so hate this for my paretns.  Both of them are trying to keep things together but it is getting so hard especially for Mother.  She is going through depression which I can easily understand.  I just wish that there was more that I could do for her. Dad wants to pass away at home so that is what Mother will do.  She wants to let him do whatever he wants.  What a time this is!! 

Mike is back to work today full time!!  This is his 3rd week back at work.  The first two weeks were part time!  He has jumped right back into the selling part and bringing in money for Lowe's...which they are grateful for.  He is walking pretty well but still having pain/ache.  Time is going to be what he needs yet.

That is about it from us here!!  As always I have been rambling but that is what I do anymore.  Ramble from here to there.  Waiting for Home care to come now and hoping to be released!!  I need to get back to driving...soon...please!!

Thougth for the day:  The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say, Well, she looks good doesn't she.'  SMILE!!

Only a few more weeks and hopefully I will be back to walking!!  I have NEVER missed something so bad in my whole life.  I have always been someone that walks fast and drives fast.  Everyone is telling me that I have to learn to SLOW down.  When you have been used to doing things quickly now they tell you to slow down.  HM!!

Through this whole experience I have went from surprise to a very low depression.  I have an awful problem of claustropbia.  It just seems to be getting worse as I age.  I have been very confined lately since I fell and broke my ankle.  I cannot walk and that really does confine you. 

It finally got so bad that I had to have some medication to make it through each day.  The cast can be very tight and along with not being able to walk that equals into a depression for me.  My cast is now off and I am in a BIG black boot (very fashionable).  It is 100% better than a cast for sure!!

Through all of this I have tried to look for the blessings.  Along with that though I have noticed how I feel.  Being in a wheelchair just seems to open up your eyes to all that is around you.  Trying to get into a door at a store or a bathroom, sitting and having to look up at everyone as they stand around you talking (feel like a little kid again).  Trying to go into church and realizing that the aisle in front goes straight down and my brakes do not work like that.  Trying to get into a bathroom and the door will not completely open or at least will not let me in right away.  The handicap bathrooms are wonderful.  In a car, the handicap placard is wonderful.  One thing though that I have noticed is that there are lowered levels on the sidewalks that are extremely important.  With this handicap I will never look at people in wheelchairs and on crutches the same again!!


I have learned several lessons.  Be kind to everyone that need help getting in a door...etc.  I have always done that but it makes me look even more at these people and want to help them more.  I have learned that Patience is quite a goal.  I have had to endure this painful word every day now for 5 weeks and counting!!  I have learned family is wonderful.  What I would have done without my family...well I just cannot imagine that.  I have had great care from everyone.  My hubby is my hero!!  Always has been and through all of this he has taken the best care of me.  He cooks, washes dishes and clothes.  I cannot thank him enough. Our oldest granddaughter, Brie, stepped in right as I got home from the hospital.  She was just a dear helping me do things like a shower.  Poor girl!!  I felt sorry for her to have to see more of her grandmother than she should EVER have to see.  She is studying to be a nurse someday!!  She is going to be a gem at it!!

As I said, today is my 5th week on this long long journey!!  It sounds like I have about 1 more month before I will be standing up and walking.  I am really looking forward to this!!  WHEW!!  Just to walk again!!

Now next I am facing a rotator cuff operation!!  Will this "LUCK" of mine ever quit???  I am hoping to put it off for a little bit!!  I need to get back to walking and being me for a bit.  I have heard that it is not so bad...Guess I will see!!

That's the big news from me now.  Yeap I am rambling but that is what I do best!!

Thought for the day:  Handle your present with confidence.  Prepare for the future without fear.  Keep the faith and drop the fear. 

Handicapped in Illinois

Since my last post I have had 2 casts!!  The first one was purple and all autographed in silver pen...now I have a Daisy Yellow one (autographed again).  I wanted a bright cast to maybe make me feel more Springy.  I would like to tell you that it worked but I can only take so much of this sitting around and not being able to walk.

You know when life seems to be so normal and we maybe even think it is boring...we wonder!!  But let me tell you that once that s taken away from you...then normal seems like the best of all worlds.

This broken ankle (right) and sprang ankle (left) really are gettting to me after these past few weeks.  I am going on 4 weeks now.  I want to get up and walk.  My sprang ankle hurts a WHOLE lot more than my operated one in the cast.  I have found out that you can only read so many books...watch so many movies...sit only so long and then it all becomes derpessing.  I have heard it said that a spring can hurt more than a break...well it is true!!

I will admit that I have had a lot of problems accepting this handicap!!  I am not a one that loves to sit!!  I love to go and go and go!!  This has certainly dampened my activities  since I cannot walk.  I have a really great wheelchair...if there is a great wheelchair!!  I am learning how to get aound in it quite well.  BUT I still want to walk..run..that is not going to happen anytime soon.

I am in my 3rd week..almost 4th...but I think I have yet another 2-3 weeks to go.  Mike is doing great with his bi-lateral knee replacement!!  He is having a tough time right now but we were told that this is normal for this amount of time.  I just hope and pray that soon he gets all better.  Will make me feel better too!!

My brother is here now visiting with our parents.  Dad seems to be doing well...we all know that this is short-lived but we go now one day at a time and be thankful for this!!

Spring is trying hard to come here in Illinois!!  Spring was always my favorite season.  I miss the Savannah flowers and the warmer weather.  Cannot have both!!

Hopefully everyone is doing great in blog land.  I have been so lazy on blogging and on reading blogs.  I don't know why I cannot seem to do it anymore.  I love knowing that everyone that I have met over this past 6 years are doing great!! 

Thought for the day: 

 Life is short.....  forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile

My view for the next 6 weeks!!



Here I sit with my right let up in the air on two big pillows!!  It is all wrapped up in a splint now until my incision heals.  After that I get the staples out and a beautiful cast put on!!  I have been out of the hospital since Friday!!  What a life I am leading!!

Here is Annie, our cat...she sits on my lap almost all of the time

I cannot stand up so trying to do simple things like go to the bathroom...It is a MAJOR undertaking!! Makes me tired and I am usually sweating by the time I am done!!  Nothing and I mean nothing is easy any longer.
You might be wondering what I did!!  I have been taking care of Mike with his double knee replacement. I was carrying stuff down the steps.  Was going to go back up and make sure that Mike was getting down okay when all of a sudden that bottom step did me in!!  I fell with my right leg going under my bottom. I was screaming but as I looked at my right foot it just took a trip all by itself clear to the right!!  That made me feel very queasy.  I hollered at Mike to get Roger.  Once Roger got to me I was not a happy camper and was really crying and he kept trying to calm me down.  They got me some medication.  Roger said he thought that my ankle or my leg was broken which sent me into more major hysterics.  All I could think about was how was I going to take care of Mike and my dad!!

Roger constructed a cardboard splint and put my right leg into it with ice and then it he used Ace Bandages and wrapped it all up.

We headed out for St. Joes..Can you just imagine how funny I must have looked getting up the steps?  I scooted up each and every step till I got the the kids kitchen.  I then just stayed on my bum and slid to the front door..dusting their tile all of the way!!

Once at the hospital we got to looking at my left foot and noticed that it was swelling pretty good.  OOOPS!! They admitted me finally because my right foot was broken so badly that I would have to have surgery.

Dr. came in that night like around midnight or after.  He told me that he was not sure if my left foot was broken or not.  He would do surgery the next day but while I was out he would look at my left foot.  He told me that IF it were also broken I would be down for 12 weeks!!  WHEW!!

We found out the next day after the surgery that he had a time getting my right foot straight BUT that my left foot is just sprain really bad!! 

I was in the hospital for about 4.5 days.  I came home to scooting down the steps and back to my home.
Also during this whole time..My dad went on Hospice.  They are coming to their apt now.  That makes me feel better since I cannot do a thing to help them any longer.  I will be home bound for 6 weeks. 

Our son Jon and his sweet new wife, Maria came to visit my dad.  We had not met Maria.  They were married in July.  I had so so been wanting to meet her and here I am in the hospital and meeting our new daughter in law!! 

 Mike and I and our son Jon and his wife Maria!! Mike and I look wiped out!!

She was just what I thought she would be!!  Sweet and just a darling lady!!  I had really missed our son, Jon.  When I saw him it made me cry thinking that I have missed him terribly!

So much went on in just that one week of me being in the hospital.  Now being home we have had our apt flood because of a spigot outside that froze over the winter.  We had to move back up stairs while it was being dryed out.

Our 21 year old granddaughter, Brie came to take care of us for a few weeks.  We are quite the team..Mikey and myself!!  He is doing really well but still has more weeks ahead of him to get completely well.  He and I sit in our recliners and watch TV and try to help each other as much as we can.  What a fun couple!!

Thanks to all of you who have or are still praying for all of us!!  We have a lot going on now but with your great prayers, cards and phone calls things are going to be okay!!

Thought for the day: 

The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling.  And even more beautiful, is knowing that you are the reason behind it!!

Moving, operations and health problems

I have so many things to write about since I have been so delinquent in my blogging!  My life has been on the up and the down a lot in the past 6 months.  I thought that things were settling down but then they just speeded right up again.  LIFE and welcome to it!!

Our living room before...



We had been trying to get our basement apt done by Christmas.  We did not meet that goal so we headed for my birthday in February!!  In the meantime, we went to an orthopedist about Mike's knees.  They have been bad for such a long time...years in fact!! 

Our living room after...

At the orthopedist we found out that he was bone on bone in his knees which he figured that he was.  His x-rays showed that both of his knees were bowed.  The doctor said that he definietly needed a knee replacement..both knees.  Mike wanted to get them both replaced.  The doctor tried to discourage us but with both knees so bowed we figured that if one was done he would be walking funny...Plus our insurance is about to change.  All in all we knew this was the BEST time to get this all done and finished.

Mike in the hospital...



Mike and our son-in-laws finished our apt the week before my birthday...our goal was met.  Mike had his surgery set up for the 21st..one day after my birthday!!  He went in that Monday morning.  A lot of family showed up to show their support.

We had to be there at 5 am.  The hospital where Dr. D operates is about 45 minutes from us.  He told us it was smaller and that he would be able to stay longer. 

That morning we got him admitted and then off to the med/surg floor.  Waiting is the hardest of all to do.  I would almost rather be the patient.  He was in surgery for about 2 hours.  He did great through the surgery.

We had a good stay there at this smaller hospital.  Course I had to travel down a two lane highway every day for 7 days which is how long Mike stayed.  The people were really great, friendly and kind.  Mike was up the same day as the surgery moving his legs.  He walked the next day and then from there he just walked further and further.  He still has to use a walker but I am guessing it is not going to be long!! 

The pain has been unbearable but he has stood it really well.  Actually he has been a good patient.  Now that we are home an even better one.  Very brave!!

The same day that he was coming home my mother called saying that they were taking my dad to the hospital.  I was so torn..which way do I go.  Our youngest daughter went to be with her gma and gpa which really helped me.  I went to the hospital and brought Mike home that same day.  He was glad to be home.  Back to our little apt that he has fixed up for us.

My dad and Mother before the hospital stay...



My dad was in the hosptial a few days only to find out that he has a bleeding ulcer.  They have tested it and found that the ulcer is a tumor and it is malignant.  He came home this past week.  Tomorrow I am going with them to see the cancer doctor in Mattoon.  I don't know what we are going to find out of course, but I know that we have all opted for him NOT to have anythng radical done.  At the ripe old age of 92 that seems to be the LAST thing that he needs done to him.  I guess you know that something has to end your life one of these days and now my dad knows.  I think that he is probably glad about this.  He has been wanting to die for such a long time now. His quality of life sort of stinks!!  I know that God knows that but of course we do not know.  We have to live every moment for what we can get out of our life.  God takes care of the rest.

We are now here in our little cute and cozy apartment.  I really love it.  I have put some pictures here for you to see. The guys did such a great job down here.  We have 3 rooms and a nice sized bathroom.  WE do have 2 windows.  Our bedroom has no windows so that makes it a great place to sleep in.  The problem is you never know the time unless you look at the clock of course.  If you are ever in our area stop by and see us.  We love company!!

Thought for the day:  "

Our job is obedience.

God's job is results.